Showing posts with label Health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Health. Show all posts

Thursday, 8 July 2021

7 Things Not About Food Or Exercise That Will Help You Lose Weight

Diet 

 

Take the indirect route.

Rebecca Thomas

Jun 28·4 min read

 


 

 Photo by Brooke Lark on Unsplash

Are you experiencing weight loss fatigue?

If you’d like to set down thinking about diet and exercise for a bit but not abandon your end goal, this article is for you.

 

Sometimes the best approach is sideways.

There’s a tremendous benefit to having clear goals and going for them. That’s not particularly true in weight loss. There are simply too many factors to contend with to give one objective all the focus.

Your weight is a by-product of how you construct your life.

Instead, work on various aspects of your life that allow you to take care of yourself with ease. After all, weight loss is an outcome of consistent, healthful practices. To do that day-in and day-out, you need a life structured to assist you.

Here are some of the most impactful ways to make progress on a healthy weight that don’t focus on workouts or diet.

Go To Therapy

One way talk therapy can help you with your weight: Most of us live with or are in relationships with people who aren’t on board with healthful living. As you begin to form healthy weight practices you’ll need to make requests of or ask for adjustments from the people in your lives.

  • Please don’t bring home sweets
  • Let’s go for a walk instead of brunch
  • I’d rather not happy hour

You get the idea. If you’re a person who can’t communicate what you need for fear of losing relationships that’s reason enough to go to therapy. Our past traumas really do stop us from building the lives we most want.

Withdraw From A Time Consuming Commitment

I can’t say this any more clearly: achieving and keeping a healthy weight takes time. It’s not something you do on the margins, it’s the defining principle by which you organize your life.

Yep.

An easy route to getting more movement is fewer things to do (and leave the time open). What did people do in record numbers during the pandemic? They went outside to bike and hike. That was the natural inclination once everyone wasn’t so busy.

Examine Your Finances

This video below makes a compelling case for tracking your money (beyond saving for retirement or rainy day expenses). Where you spend reveals your emotional state, or how you self-soothe.

Sometimes, awareness is what’s needed as a catalyst for change. This accountant brilliantly breaks down the connection between spending, emotions, and the power of observation.

Work On Your Sleep

Sleep is vital to weight loss, and losing sleep is directly associated with weight gain. Working on your sleep is working on your weight.

The good news is that there’s a lot you can do about it. Right now, tonight. I wrote this recent piece on creating good sleep environments with excellent resources at the end.

Declutter Your Home

This one hadn’t occurred to me until I started doing discussions with Kristen of Minima Organizing & Redesign. She has one of my favorite Instagram accounts that is both smart and gorgeous. We also share many similar life principles and have become business buddies.

She told me that reigning in clutter often spurred her clients on to lose weight. It makes complete sense that tackling one pressing challenge would then make space for addressing another. Plus, you don’t have so much stuff to attend to, so, more free time.

Learn To Make A Dish

Yes, this is about food but really the focus is on developing an important skill, learning to make your own meals with ease.

Knowing your way around the kitchen is essential for long-term weight loss. You have better control over your intake and it allows you to make things you get genuine pleasure from eating. That’s right, enjoying your food is an important part of living at a healthy weight.

Cooking is how you move from using food as an indulgence to one of pleasure. It creates reverence. It’s as intentional as it gets.

Take a mental health walk.

If you struggle with anxiety or depression, a daily walk needs to be part of your toolkit. It’s powerful medicine.

My fitness needs have changed over the years but my walking practice never has. It’s fundamental to my well-being as a person. I walk for joy, always outside, and along routes with plenty of visual pleasure. Sometimes that’s architecture, sometimes it’s nature.

The easiest way to get going is to embrace simplicity.

Forget workout clothes or complicated trackers. Put on a pair of comfortable shoes and go.

Join my email list for more helpful insights.

An anti-diet, pro-weight loss publication and program. We dismantle culture’s awful ideas about weight and give you useful ones.


Sunday, 30 May 2021

How to be resilient: This practical guide to dealing with setbacks is essential reading

Resilience 

 

 Ensure you're making practical self-care steps to avoid becoming overwhelmed by the 'new normal'.

 

Photo by David Wirzba on Unsplash


Life might be getting back to normal but many of us are still feeling the effect of the pandemic on our mental health. In fact, you might not even realise the full impact the past year has had on your mental health until you're back in 'the real world'. Indeed, recent ONS figures show cases of depression are on the rise despite lockdown lifting. From the period of 27th January to 7th March 2021, around 1 in 5 (21%) adults in the UK experienced some form of depression, an increase since November 2020 (when the figure stood at 19%) and more than double that observed before the Coronavirus pandemic (10%).

That's why it's so important to take heed of your own mental health and ensure you're making practical self-care steps to avoid becoming overwhelmed by the 'new normal'.

"Mental health is a huge part of all of our lives and for too many of us it’s a mystery, but if we understand our minds we can put ourselves in control so we can really live," says Daniel Howell, a mental health activist and author of You Will Get Through This Night

Inspired by Dan’s own mental health journey shared with millions of his fans on stage and screen, along with his work as an ambassador for mental health charity Young Minds, his new book promises to be a practical guide to understanding and taking control of your mental health, written in an entertaining and personal way from someone who has been through it all.

Written in consultation with psychologist Dr. Heather Bolton and spilt over three sections; This Night, Tomorrow and The Day After, the book provides a refreshing, realistic approach to looking after your mental wellbeing the way we all experience it - whether you are in a crisis, just looking to make a change or want to know how to look after yourself every day.

One key aspect of his book is how to be resilient and deal with setbacks, which we are adamant will prove extremely useful for anyone struggling as we come out of lockdown....

"We all know that life can throw a curveball when we least expect it, so it’s important to know how to cope with these surprises, and not let them throw you off your positive momentum.

Life is a rollercoaster, or more like the graph shape of a llama rolling down a hill and climbing up again. We can’t predict the chaos. Despite our best efforts and intentions, it’s normal to have ups and downs. Remember that mental health is not a straight line, we can do what we can to raise the floor level, but it will always wave with the happenings of the world.

It doesn’t have to be a sudden shocking event, such as a… lightning strike! (sorry?) Life is naturally full of moments of change that we need to be able to handle. Breakups, moving, changing jobs – things that are very common can throw us off our track and we should all know how to keep ourselves on the rails.

Resilience

Training your resilience can help you to keep going in the face of adversity. It’s more than just bouncing back, it’s the act of moving forward as we grow from our experiences. Being resilient can look like:

  • Viewing challenges as opportunities
  • Focusing on the things you can control
  • Adapting your response to challenging situations
  • Maintaining a sense of purpose and drive
  • Asking for support when needed

Training your resilience can help you to keep going in the face of adversity.

Resilience is about being realistically optimistic. It’s not wishful thinking, it’s just being aware of what you can actually achieve and allowing yourself to be hopeful that you will succeed. Don’t be cynical about your own abilities, planting a seed of doubt that can self-sabotage. If you second guess yourself, it could be a self- fulfilling prophecy. Be realistic, but be fair to yourself and go into situations wanting to win!

It’s not something that’s fixed, it fluctuates through life and is something we can develop. It’s partly about our mindset, but also about how we respond in the face of stressful situations.

Most importantly, it’s not about pushing through the pain, telling yourself you’re being brave (don’t hide the pain, Harold), it’s about honestly accepting what you can handle and being practical.

Don’t overwork or exhaust yourself; it’s unrealistic to expect to cope with literally everything all the time!

Think about the attitude you have when you approach situations. Let’s imagine two different people being rejected after a particularly awkward first date:

They both have similar first thoughts: ‘Well that’s disappointing’ and ‘will I ever love again?’

But then how they make sense of that situation is different:
– Akachi starts to accept that not everyone will love her, their date wasn’t right for her anyway, and decides to take control by getting back out there and finding another fish in the sea.

– Fernando doesn’t accept it, but gets stuck on the idea that they’ll always be rejected, they’ll never meet anyone and be lonely forever to live as a spectre haunting the local lighthouse.

Both people are in the same situation but approach it with very different attitudes, which affects how they respond. To build up your own resilience to setbacks, it’s important to understand ‘adaptive coping’ (see opposite).

Self-care service station

During stressful and challenging times, self-care is essential to maintain your overall resilience, so don’t forget the basics – eating, sleep and hygiene, and staying hydrated.

It may sound simple, but if you let these slip it can chip away at your hard work and your mindset.

Try to keep your positive routine and stay on top of necessary stuff – having routine and structure gives you a strong foundation for coping.
Take time for yourself – literally remember to breathe, be mindful if you need a moment and take time to do things you enjoy to recover.


Reading the signals right

Psychological theory says we tend to see stressful situations in one of three broad ways: a challenge, a threat, or a loss.

Seeing it as a challenge → having hope, a fighting spirit and putting energy into finding a solution.

Seeing it as a threat → assuming the worst, feeling anxious and deflated.

Seeing it as a loss → acting like the damage has already been done, there’s nothing you can do, and feeling helpless. 

 Try to look for aspects of your situation that you can see as a challenge to overcome – this will help you adopt a positive approach and channel your energy into solving the problem, known as adaptive coping. Of course, this might not always be possible and you can’t keep fighting forever, but there will always be an opportunity for learning from the situation.
Feeling threatened is absolutely normal, but try to notice whether you’re getting caught up with catastrophic thinking. Break the problem down and focus on what you can control, even if it’s a small piece of the 10,000 piece 1-colour jigsaw.

If you’re feeling helpless because of things you’ve lost, allow yourself to feel that – resilience involves connecting honestly with feelings, not shutting them off. It’s a healthy part of processing what’s going on for you. The key is balance.

  • Channel your energy into what you can change.
  • Evaluate any aspects bringing up anxiety.
  • Allow time to deal with your feelings.
  • Being flexible between these three approaches will help you deal with the fun of life’s many suddenly surprising challenges."

You Will Get Through This Night by Daniel Howell is available now in hardback, eBook and audio download (HQ)


Monday, 19 April 2021

How the Physical Body Holds Mental Tension

Tension 

 

The connection between mind, body, posture, and stress

Tami Bulmash

 

If you’ve ever endured a nerve-racking situation followed by a throbbing noggin, it wouldn’t seem far-fetched to connect one with the other. Nearly one in four adults reports experiencing multiple headaches every year in the United States. The World Health Organization estimates 50% of all adults have at least one headache annually. Though there are over 150 types of headaches, tension headaches are the most common and often triggered by stress. Yet while doctors might agree the two can be linked, they still don’t understand exactly how.

Brian Cole, MD, an orthopedic sports medicine surgeon at Midwest Orthopaedics at Rush and a professor of orthopedics, anatomy, and cell biology at Rush University Medical Center, agrees with this sentiment. “The exact reason why stress creates headaches is still unclear. One theory is that muscle tightness in the neck and head, which can reflexively increase with stress, results in dull tension headaches.”

It’s reasonable to presume a relationship between a headache and stressful thought exists because of where the brain is located. Since thoughts tend to be associated with the mind — which is often synonymous with the brain — they all appear to reside in the same place. However, the farther down pain travels in the body — further distancing itself from the head — the murkier the relationship between thoughts and tension becomes.

When pain is felt, it’s usually assigned to a specific body part. Localizing pain to a certain region inadvertently disconnects it from the rest of the body, thus making its origin harder to pinpoint. For instance, there is a low likelihood a medical doctor would suggest the onset of torticollis, a form of neck strain, is the result of ruminating thoughts. Linking kyphosis, or hunchback, with depression sounds even less plausible. But are connections like these really so hard to believe? Not according to Erik Peper, PhD, a professor of holistic health studies at San Francisco State University.

The manifestation of thoughts in the body

In his study, “How Posture Affects Memory Recall and Mood,” Peper illustrates how thoughts and body tension are interrelated. Participants were asked to recall negative memories while sitting in slouched and upright positions. They were told to do this again, but this time to think of positive memories. Peper’s research found that 86% of participants reported it was easier to access negative memories when collapsed than upright, and 87% of participants said it was easier to access positive images while erect than hunched over.

Peper explains, “If you are in a collapsed position, I think almost everybody finds it harder to access or be really involved in a positive memory and vice versa. When you’re in the upright position, it doesn’t mean you can’t have negative or hopeless thoughts. However, if you keep that opposition — as if you’re slightly removed from the emotional impact, once you’re in the upright position, it’s easier to access the more empowering and positive thoughts. Because thoughts and body are not separate.”

The evolutionary patterns of posture are described in Peper’s book, Tech Stress, where he examines the prevalent symbols of power throughout evolution. “A depressed or collapsed posture is a universal symbol of constricted posture in both humans and animals. In nature, throughout the animal kingdom, collapsed posture indicates submission. On the other hand, erect posture universally indicates leadership.”

But don’t get too excited about straightening your back just yet. There is a difference between sitting tall — which connotes length — and sitting straight. The latter has become a well-known way to command sitting correctly. Thoughts evoked by picturing a “straight” back might resemble a soldier pose, the most common depiction of what “standing up straight” looks like. Yet, if the images associated with a straight back were truly congruent with alignment — or balance for that matter — good posture would not be analogous to a fixed and tense figure.

The power of habit

The desire to perform activities successfully is a deep-seated norm. “Sitting up straight” is the perfect example of how people may unwittingly arch backs, lift chests, pull back shoulders, and tighten necks — namely contort their bodies — in a strained attempt to do it the “right” way. Because the alternative — collapse — represents defeat.

A century-old method known as the Alexander technique was developed upon the principle of unknown habits. The founder of the technique, F.M. Alexander, was a Shakespearean actor who repeatedly lost his voice during performances. He thought he was doing everything right, yet his problem only worsened.

Alexander sought the aid of medical professionals to fix his problem but to no avail. He came to wonder if perhaps it was something he was doing to himself that caused his laryngitis. He learned that once he stopped repeating certain habits — such as standing soldier-like while performing — his voice returned. More importantly, he discovered the self-imposed pressure to perform successfully resulted in tense and tight positioning that constricted his breathing and voice.

The next time you sense the slightest tinge of stress — whether you’re running late or feeling angry, frustrated, or generally inadequate — just pause. Take note of what is happening in your body. Catching that moment is key.

Common contributing stressors

Wanting to succeed in life is part of human nature. Social comparison theory tells us that individuals determine their own worth based on thoughts of how they stack up against others. Yet, comparison doesn’t always lead to self-improvement. For example, social media has made measuring up seem impossible as it takes a considerable toll on self-esteem and can lead to depression.

In addition to the pressure of achieving or maintaining success, Americans are notorious workaholics. They work long hours, take few vacations, are more likely to work at night or on weekends, and feel pressured for time. It’s no wonder Americans are among the most stressed people in the world.

Beret Arcaya, a master Alexander technique teacher and the founding member of the American Society for the Alexander Technique, describes this as a “habit of thoughts.” She says this is something we do with our brain and we don’t have to. “You don’t have to be on that rat race. You really don’t. But you’ve got to get conscious of when you’re doing it.”

The way you react to each situation is a choice, though until that choice is realized, the reaction remains a habit. When it comes to lack of time, Arcaya explains, “You have to say, ‘Ah, I was just thinking that way again — I don’t have any time, I don’t have any time, I don’t have any time!’ Wait a minute. Stop and feel what happens to your breath.”

Arcaya tells her students there may never be enough time, but that’s fine. There might even be a way out of the rat race if you don’t react to it. She says, “Don’t even argue with the habit. Don’t even argue with ‘I don’t have enough time, or I didn’t have time today.’ It will make you stay in the moment, and that will elongate the time.” In other words, wait before responding to a stressful thought because that delay keeps you in the present.

Psycho-physical pain

Having taught the Alexander technique for over 40 years, Arcaya is no stranger to human behavior and how habits present themselves as tension. A renowned teacher, people come to her when they have exhausted all other options to ameliorate their pain.

One such woman came to her after suffering for years with terrible neck pain. Doctors couldn’t find a way to help her. They didn’t consider her stress level even though thoughts of neglect, abandonment, betrayal, and loss consumed the woman’s life. She developed a wrenching spasm of the neck called torticollis shortly after the passing of someone beloved to her.

Arcaya recalls it was way beyond a stiff neck, the woman was essentially trapped in her pain. The pain made it impossible to eat or walk properly, forcing her to walk sideways. It seemed the woman couldn’t face the events of her life. Her head was turned away, and the tension locked it there. It was as if it was all too much; she couldn’t even look at it.

When asked if she believed thoughts could directly impact the body, Arcaya responded, “Thoughts and the way you think — and the whole way you are when you are thinking — is your body tension. It doesn’t impact it; it is it.”

See it to believe it

As past president of the Association for Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback, Peper is an established biofeedback expert. His work focuses on training individuals to learn awareness and gain control of body functions through the aid of electromyography (EMG). During a treatment, biofeedback sensors are attached to the skin to measure the body’s biological signals that are shown as feedback that informs and assists in health improvement.

The psycho-physiological principle asserts that “every change in the physiological state is accompanied by an appropriate change in the mental-emotional state, conscious or unconscious, and conversely, every change in the mental-emotional state, conscious or unconscious, is accompanied by an appropriate change in the physiological state.”

Another study led by Peper, who was instrumental in establishing the first holistic health program at a public university in the United States, recorded physiological signals demonstrating the mind-body connection.

A 25-year-old participant who had been playing the piano for 16 years was asked to relax and then imagine playing a musical piece in a series of intervals. Muscle activity was recorded from her right forearm extensor muscles and displayed on a large screen so that other group participants could observe. Each time she imagined playing the piano, the forearm extensor muscle tension increased, even though there was no observed finger and forearm movements. The physiological monitoring showed how her body responded to “playing” only in her thoughts. When recordings of her movement were shown later, she reported being completely unaware of activating her muscles — especially since her forearm appeared to stay in a relaxed position.

If the mere conscious thought of performing an activity (such as playing the piano) can evince body tension, what can be said about the impact of unconscious thinking? This begs the question of what might happen to the body with repeated thoughts of anger, resentment, and hopelessness — or with thoughts of kindness and love.

What you can do (or not do) about your thoughts

According to Arcaya, thoughts don’t have to become tension. She says, “We’re always directing ourselves. We don’t realize it a lot because it is subconscious.” She notes that direction provides a purpose toward a goal that serves to guide or motivate. “To have conscious direction is to take agency over your life. It’s to have self-possession. To take your energy and decide what you will and what you will not do.”

When thought is attached to an expectation and the outcome is unmet, the reaction will translate into tension. That is unless the habitual response is recognized first. The next time you sense the slightest tinge of stress — whether you’re running late or feeling angry, frustrated, or generally inadequate — just pause. Take note of what is happening in your body. Catching that moment is key. Pay attention to your thoughts. Giving yourself even 10 seconds to pause might allow you to substantially calm your nerves and prevent you from going down a familiar spiral that could lead to stress and pain.

Albert Einstein famously said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.” A habit can only be changed if it is recognized. Then it’s up to you to make the choice of which direction you choose to take. You could repeat the same habit and get the same outcome or pause and see if a new path presents itself. Who knows, you might even bypass a headache (or two or three or 20) along the way.

I write and teach about the mind-body connection and its relationship to health and well-being. More at https://www.bodyandposture.com/


Thursday, 25 March 2021

Happiness Is the New Rich. Inner Peace Is the New Success.

Happiness makes you rich 

 

Inner peace is when something bad happens and you’re happy about it.

 


 

Self-improvement isn’t the same anymore.

When I started writing seven years ago on a self-help website called Addicted2Success, it was all about the following:

  • Get rich or die trying.
  • Photos of luxury purchases.
  • An obsession with hard work.
  • Entrepreneurship as a religion.

Now, seven years on, Syed Balkhi said it best:

“Happiness is the new rich. Inner peace is the new success. Health is the new wealth. Kindness is the new cool.”

Happiness Is the New Rich

Money doesn’t make you happy. Read that again.

You’re smart and you already knew that. It’s some of the most cliche advice you will ever receive in your life. The focus in the self-help industry has shifted away from money in recent years. We’ve all read the headlines of a rich person who got famous and seems to have more problems than one could ever imagine.

Billie Eilish, Charlie Sheen, Ellen Degeneres, Chandler from the tv show Friends, Elon Musk and his bad jokes, former political power Donald Duck … Do you need me to keep going?

These people have plenty of money. They seem to be untouchable, yet they have all the problems of the world on their shoulders. They’re not happy — they’re endlessly chasing a form of happiness that doesn’t exist. Call it toxic happiness if you will.

The new generation of rich people doesn’t have money. They have found happiness. Where? In strange places they weren’t expecting.

That’s what happened to me. I found happiness after years of life-threatening mental illness. It came from a strange place: a blog about success. The blog wasn’t the cure. The blog was the start of a different way of thinking.

It took seven years to understand this is real happiness:

  • Time to do what you want.
  • A human character you’re proud to have created.
  • A mission slightly bigger than yourself.
  • A family you love and get to spend time with.

Money is an information system that lives in a boring excel spreadsheet. Happiness is a feeling you get when you look back on where you’re at in life and gently smile at how far you’ve come.

The new rich aren’t chasing money anymore. They’ve found real happiness through the cliche parts of life that are overlooked.

Inner Peace Is the New Success

Inner peace is the opposite of being stressed or anxious. You get inner peace by gaining perspective. Let me give you an example. I spoke to a guy from work. We disagreed about how to divide our customer portfolios. I told him this:

“You can have all the customer relationships you want. You can hoard them. But if you die tomorrow, how many of those customers will be at your funeral? And if one or two decide to come along, how long will it take for them to get over you and become somebody else’s customer? Answer: 48 hours at the most.”

This is perspective. The same scenario applies to your employer. If you were involved in a car accident and didn’t make it out alive, how long would it take your employer to replace you? Would they be emotional about it?

Nope.

They’d spawn up a new employee to sit in your office chair in no time at all. So why do you give more than 50% of your life to an employer and take the whole relationship seriously? They don’t care. They don’t lack empathy and they’re not unkind. It’s just that your employer has perspective on your role in their company and the value of your life.

Once you have perspective on what matters, your life changes.

Inner peace to me is having somebody run into my car and smiling at them.

“It’s okay. You didn’t mean it. You must be having a rough day. How about we do coffee and exchange license plates. We could even eat cheeseburgers.”

That’s inner peace. Something bad happens and you’re happy about it. Why? You expect bad things to happen. Bad things are part of life. People make mistakes. Cars fly off the road and into yours. People say things they don’t mean without thinking beforehand.

Jay Shetty is a former monk. He is one of the most famous personalities on the internet. The success of Jay Shetty is the result of all the years of inner peace he learned as a monk. I’m not joking when I say monks and teachers are the next generation of successful people.

Success used to be get more.
Success is now have less to get more inner peace.

When you take away stress and anxiety from life, your mind has room to breathe (figuratively speaking). You can see things other people can’t see. You can reflect on your life and join the dots of your future in an entirely different way. Success is simply living your life the way you were supposed to: in peace.

The inner peace of knowing you have enough and are enough, is a thought worth thinking deeply about.

Health Is the New Wealth

If you are young, then you’re a billionaire.

Warren Buffet is one of the richest investors in the world. He has lots of money, but not a lot of time left. His diet to this day includes Coca-Cola and McDonalds. Warren would do anything to trade some (or all) of his money for more time on earth. Warren is poor because time is against him. Life extension technology is still some time off.

When you see time as wealth, you won’t trade your time for money any longer. You will accumulate assets that help you buy your time back, and take the time you have and increase its value.

When I go to eat food, the first question I ask myself is, “Will this food give me energy or take away energy?” Energy leads to a better quality of life. When you’re healthy, you feel better. When you feel better, you feel wealthy. Wealth through health is an opportunity all of us have access to. How do you look after your health? You already know the answers.

Eat plants, exercise daily, practice mindfulness, focus on the present, protect your sleep, spend time in nature, build strong human bonds with others.

Kindness Is the New Cool

Selfishness ruled the world when I began using social media. It was all about how much you could extract from the internet for yourself. Bragging and selfies dominated. Showing off was standard. Being rude to people in the comments section was acceptable and expected.

Then the online selfishness movement quietly changed.

The trend started on Youtube with channels such as “That was Epic.” Then kindness infected Zucks’ empire, Facebook, through pages such as Humankind and Try Not To Cry. Even on you-must-keep-a-straight-face-and-be-professional platforms like LinkedIn have their own kindness movements.

Why is kindness the new cool? Duh … it feels good.

It’s our secret naughty fantasy. We shouldn’t love kindness. It feels tacky, gimmicky even. But kindness, no matter how small, makes you feel something. You can’t resist being attracted to kindness if you are human.

Self-help brought kindness back in fashion. Let’s help to keep it that way with small acts of random kindness wherever possible.

Closing Thought

What is timeless always comes back in fashion. The problem is, humanity forgets about what matters. All it takes is a global event such as a pandemic to bring us back together again.

Don’t become obsessed with money. Focus on the removal of unhelpful forms of stress and your version of happiness. Don’t spend the majority of your time in the future with your thoughts. Come back to the present to find inner peace. Don’t trade your energy for garbage inputs.

See energy as health, and health as true wealth. Trade money for health. Health buys you more time. Lastly, trade selfishness for small moments of selflessness. If you can learn to go beyond your own survival, you can discover higher levels of living.

The self-improvement movement finally came full circle.
Rich people are those who are happy.

The good life is happiness money can’t buy.

Tim Denning

Written by

Aussie Blogger with 100M+ views — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship — timdenning.com/wc

The Ascent

 

Tuesday, 23 February 2021

How self-talk and one simple mantra helped me achieve my weight loss goals for good

Weight Loss With Self-Talk 

 It's that time of year again when people feel they need to lose weight.  Here is one way to achieve this:

Speaking to yourself in this way is called “distanced self-talk” and is scientifically proven to help people achieve their health goals.

 

Photo by Chen Mizrach on Unsplash


By Rachel Hosie

It was a Friday evening in early 2019, and I’d just got home from dinner with friends. I flopped on to my bed, freed my food baby from the shackles of my jeans, and sighed.

I was trying to lose weight. So why had I eaten myself into a state of discomfort? Why did I fill up on tortilla chips and hummus when I knew there was so much more food to come? Why did I have the third piece of bread?

Why couldn’t I just get it together?

Read more: I lost 35 pounds in 6 months without going on a diet, and it taught me 7 lessons about eating for healthy fat loss

After years of overeating, it was a familiar refrain in my internal monologue. But then that voice in my head said something else: You can’t mess this up.

Instead of spiraling, I remembered that the only way you fail is by quitting. Instead, I would learn from the experience, and get back on track.

And that’s exactly what I did, which led me to finally losing weight for good, getting in shape, and building a new, healthier relationship with food and my body.

Reframe ‘failures’ as learning opportunities

For so many people, the barrier to sustainable weight loss is that they think they have to have a “perfect” diet all the time, but no one can do that. So when I inevitably stuffed my face with chocolate one night, instead of beating myself up for “ruining everything,” I told myself that I didn’t.

It was something to learn from. And as long as I got straight back on track, I would still reach my goals and it really wouldn’t make that much difference.

After all, no one gets a six-pack after one salad and no one becomes obese after one box of chocolates. As the months went on during my weight loss journey two years ago, I saw first-hand that this is true: I was working on my overeating tendencies, and while I still succumbed from time to time, it didn’t actually prevent me from achieving my goals.

On days where I went way over the calories I was aiming for, I stopped to think about why I did that. Maybe there was something I could work on. Maybe I’d just think, “OK, I didn’t really need all that food or that fourth glass of wine. But I enjoyed it, and that’s fine.”

Consistency always trumps perfection, and I learned that aiming for 80% consistency with my diet and nutrition was the way to go.

You can’t fail if you don’t quit

Changing your mindset is so important for weight loss success, and any good health coach knows this.

I first heard the “you can’t mess this up” mantra from personal trainer and fat loss coach Jordan Syatt.

Syatt explained to Insider that the reason the mantra is so powerful is that most people never achieve their fitness goals — be that weight loss, muscle gain, or simply feeling better in their body — because they think they need to be perfect to get there.

And when they aren’t “perfect,” they think they’ve ruined their progress and might as well not bother trying, which isn’t true.

“You can’t fail, because the only way you screw up is if you quit,” Syatt said. “As long as you understand that you’re never more than one bite away from getting back on track, then you can’t lose, you can’t fail. And the more you remember this, the more likely you are to achieve your goals.”

‘Distanced self-talk’ helps people reach their goals

According to psychologist and author of “Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It” Dr. Ethan Kross, my mantra is particularly effective because it uses “you” rather than “I.”

Kross told Insider that it’s a lot easier for us to give advice to others than to follow our own advice. So by using second and third person pronouns (like “you” or “she”), we’re able to be more objective and create some mental distance from our own experiences.

Read more: It’s time to reframe exercise and stop thinking of it as punishment

“People are better able to follow through with their goals when they talk to themselves using what we call ‘distanced self-talk,’” Kross said.

This was proven in relation to healthy eating in a recent study conducted by Kross and his team.

I’ll tell myself I can’t mess this up forever

I am in a much healthier, happier place now than I was a few years ago. I no longer think of foods as good or bad, or exercise as punishment.

Yes, my body has changed a lot over the years, but what you don’t see in a “before and after” photo is the mental work that’s really gone on.

And that’s part of the problem with fad diets or “quick fixes” — they don’t help people develop healthier mindsets, so any physical change that may materialize won’t last.

I rarely overeat to a point of pain now, but it does still happen occasionally, because I’m only human and food is delicious. And on those occasions, I remind myself that it doesn’t make me a bad person. It hasn’t undone all the progress I’ve made over the years. I just get back on track and keep going.

You can’t mess this up.